sunshine above my head

selamat berpuasa to all muslims in the world. :D
adakah anda puasa?

wah. i still cant believe today is the starting day of the fasting month. dulu aku selalu pk bila nak puasa bila nak raya. sbb nak bday cpt. ahah. tgk la betapa cepatnya masa berlalu. aku tgk calendar mmu bagi dan rasa mcm x lama lagi raya. kalau boleh aku nak esok raya sbb aku nak balik miri.
i miss home so much!

i still remember those days when i was in miri. before i went to mmu. tolong mummy buat cake n cookies during puasa. tp tu dah lama la. she stop baking cake and cookies when i was in form berapa tah. form 2 or 3 kot. idk. the reason she stop baking because of her station. i still remember she pissed off when her workers keep on calling everytime she bake her cake. she have to rushed to her station because of her workers. haih. since that day our raya cake is made by her sister. the only cake she make every year except for last year is her very own chocolate cake. it is a must-have-every-year cake. me n abg love it so much. tp last year my aunty yg buat. lain ckit rasa. mummy did promise me that she wanted to make her own cake for this year. but idk. who will help her when she bake? im not going back to miri until 16th kot. xkan la mummy nak tggu aku balik baru buat. mana ckp 1 week. i wish i am there to help her like i used to do. i love baking cake n cookies u know. seriously. oh. i miss her caramel pudding too. waaa. its been ages since she make that pudding. ngaaa. i miss those days. raya seems different since she stop baking cake. i didnt get the raya spirit as much as im used to. i miss watching our house busy with this with that. haih.
i wonder how will raya looks like for this year.

the things that i like when fasting is food. there will be a lot of bazaar ramadhan. oh. the foods. grr. buat aku nak beli smua je. ahah. nafsu makan. i miss ayam percik kat bazaar kat indoor kat miri. oh not forget ayam panggang,bubur pedas,mee jawa, laksa n more. wah. im soooo going there when im home in miri. nasi ayam kat saberkas pun. ngaa. laksa kak ros kat riam. ngaa. sabar sabar. haha.

last year's puasa me n my friends went to peringgit. some people says that it is the longest bazaar ramadhan. i dont care if it is the longest, the shortest the widest or whatsoever. yg penting. FOODS! ahah. oh kebab. n ntah ape lagi yg aku beli last year. lupe dah.
i miss going to the bazaar with sya yana kay n yan.

ok2. dah la. nak masak utk sahur. bye people.
selamat bersahur n berpuasa.
:)

im nothing to you.
thank you. :)

i love you.
with all my heart and soul.
i love cupcakes, i love cows, i love lots of things
but i love u more than anything
i can't guarantee u total happiness
i cant guarantee you a perfect relationship
but i will be there by your side
no matter how hard its looks like
for better or for worse
that is a promise
you are my sunshine
you are my sweetest cupcake
you are my love
you are the best that i have ever had
thank you for loving me
i am deeply in love with u,
syujauddin shahruddin. :)

hello hello. :)

let me tell u what happened last night.
pkl 9 plan nak g jonker. afiq nak g.
tp pkl 10 baru gerak. haha.
ada org lmbt.
agagagaga.
g ambik afiq then g jonker.
3 kereta g jonker.
jalan2 jap.
me n kay beli takoyaki.
lamak x mkn eh.
akhirnya mkn juak mlm tek.
then g d'laman.
sbb diorg lapar.
dah g mkn kat d'laman g pantai puteri pulak.
masa tu dah pkl brape tah.
sampai2 main air laut.
then diorg main kejar2. haha.
best giler tgk.
then main the killer.
khairil punya game.
kena psycho ouh game tu.
then main game yg nyanyi2 tu.
aku surrender awal.
xleh tangkap. ahah.
then tgk jam pkl 3 ktorg balik ar.
agaga. htr afiq balik then ktorg pun balik.
balik la sgt.
lalala.

dan skrg.
aku ngantok.
tdo lmbt bgn awal.
agagaga.
oh ya.
dan lapar.
agagagaga.
:)

hello hello.
yesterday someone add me on fb.
im shocked.
it is alip who add me.
wah. lamak alu x dgr khabar nya eh.
then we chat for a while.
cerita2 la. mcm biasa.
tnyk pa khabar pa indah.
and as i expected he asked about apis.
and ada ayat nya nang best la.
sabar ajak la.
makin terok dah nya eh.
he admit himself.
nya kdrk tauk nya gne.
gne ndak ka upa nya netok ka.
ahah.

i have a feeling that i do not understand. i just want to cry. a lot. seriously. but i dont have a reason to cry for now. but i want to cry. i want to do some stupid things that keep running in my head. oh god. what is happening to me? why am i being like this? i hate being like this.

i am happy now. seriously i do. having him by my side makes me happy. but somehow deep inside my heart i want to cry my lungs out. i want to be hurt. physically. not emotionally. i've been telling him a lot of weird imaginary stories. but imagine it did not satisfy me. i want it to be real. and when it comes to real, that will be the last time u will saw me.

im not satisfied with my life. i never had. that is why my blog title is unsatisfied. it sounds like im not being grateful right? but this is me. u dont know about me. i've had enough with life. im tired. seriously. can i just end it please? i've suffered enough. i know im a weakling. people always said " u should be grateful. there are other people outside there who suffer more than u". like i said just now. i've had enough.

i wish things to be in different ways.
where can i find doraemon?
i need him now.

hello people.
if u're a regular viewer of my blog u should realize that i've change my layout.
just for fun.
back to the basic.
i've tried to put a pic behind the header.
i've edited some pic from my laptop.
tp mcm x kena.
agagaga.
testing je.
im trying to edit the html myself.
blh buat layout blog sendiri. gaga.

dah2. babai.