oh please

Tuesday, August 19, 2008 at 4:06 AM
im tired.
really tired.

mlm tek ku mimpi gajah ba. it was like we're having conversation on the phone. we talk talk talk n i cant remember y but he says "im sorry but i choose her. " omg. OMG. then i cried la lm mimpi ya kakya alu mimpi lain tp lam campus. isk. tkt ku ba. tkt apa yg nya pdh ya bna. baby r u really going to choose her? if u do just tell me earlier so i wont disturb ur relationship. please baby tell me honestly. i mean it.

haih. rtok mekorg bjual. jual cupcakes n choc cake. byk la org bjual. org nsem nok azyan ska ya pun bjual. nang ensem la nya. haha. pg tek mls da jak ku nak bgn. lelah ba. bgn jak la. tp alia lmbt sampe. tpaksa la aku dgn puteri tggu. azyan g blt ixora sbb nak print paper. aizat dtg tlg. bgs la. haha. surprisingly gajah baby g stall ku. i wonder how u can find me. agak trkejut la sbb aku x pnh jumpa nya kat campus kecuali ariya dgn grk nya n masa nya jumpa grk nya xda dgn nya. what did u tell her sampe ktk kluar sorg2 ya? nya jumpa pun sbb nak bg tiket fresh frequency ya jak. haa. ada org ska ngan puteri ba. alu mtk no. tpn alu mtk kapel. haha. ya bok cepat. laki ya agak ok la. haaa. mekorg abis bjual kol 5. masa bjual ya ku mala ingat sal kat sklh masa ada sports day. aku n eda n ahli kelab kpa bjual ba. haha. masa bjual tok agak x best glak. xtaul ka ari len. mekorg 4 org jak. aku azyan alia n puteri. aizat tlg2 jak. suppose combine dgn chinese ya tp daknya x bjual kot. biar la. haha. dah la ada crisis meja pg tek. bongok mena. haha. daknya cam x semangat glak nak bjual ba. agak x best la. just dudok gya jak. ngecat kuku. ya la. haa. aizat bait eh. walaupun bkn group mekorg nya tlg juak.thanx. :)

aku byk bjln rtok tek. 1st g mosque square pg ya then bla bla bla azyan dtg dgn paper then aizat soh crk kad manila. g a ku tek kdy buku kat main hall skali nangga xda pa2. g kdy potostat xda juak. kakya trjumpa azyan nya mbk g mkn g la mkn tek. aku jumpa zul. lmk x nangga nya. aku knk blanja N aek kiwi. ngek mena nya. aku jumpa azan dgn amer n aku tauk org ya tp xtauk nama. daknya k kemeja rtok. ada presentation. oh ait. aku ada juak eh. bila owh. comp app. pun. aiyoyoyo. haha. kakya dah g mkn blt stall. alia n puteri nak mkn tp xda sudu so mtk dgn stall lain daknya xmao brk so g ps blt sbb azyan xmok g tp soh ku beli aek k nya. haih. kakya otw blt alia soh ambik polisterin sigek tp x jd sbb aku dah dkt dgn stall dah. dah anta sudu ku blt umah jap ambik brg then g uptown beli manila kad then blt stall. jumpa kay alu mbk nya g library mlh banners. kakya blt la stall. haih. haha.

aku lapa kowh. gimme some food. haha. apa ku nak mkn owh. lmk x mkn roti bom manis kat subaidah. haha.

aku amat lelah.

gajah g men ball. ku nak g nangga ba. p nya xda soh pun. agak malu la ku nak g. haha. ne tauk nya ngalo ka. haa. haha.

netok azyan nok kuat brmsg. dlk aku. haha. ya nya mdh mekorg exchange. haih.

dah la. ckp. enuff.

babai.

i luff u baby! :)

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a tired day

Monday, August 18, 2008 at 11:47 AM
my new fav song :
the ting tings - thats not my name.

ok pg bgn kol 8 sbb kol 9 knk g booking meja kat mosque square. surprisingly ada org dah booking. so im like sapa yg book meja ya. sbb dak chinese ya xtauk group mekorg kol brapa. ala. what the hell. la. haha. kakya azyan n aku g bilit aku jap mlh banner then kluar g jumpa sya n then g mkn then dak kay join. dkt presidents square ada org bjual. dak cyber entrepreneurship. gya2 la.ka shelly pdh. best alu jak daknya. ada big apple n j.co. tp yg penting. AKU DAH MKN CHOREO. :D trcapai hajat ku eh. haha. kakya mekorg jln2 la kat presidents square alu jumpa amer. nya nyuruh g gerai nya. nya angah n dak kwn daknya jual ice blended tp masa ku g xda elektrik. gajah pdh nya g nlg dak angah tp xda pun. oh ya. i saw her gf tek. haha. kakya marly g beli nasik lemak daun pisang. nyaman eh. sampe 2 marly beli. kakya lepak jap kakya aku n azyan g security department sbb aku pun id ilang. bodo bna. tp masa mekorg g lunch time. grr. kakya g ixora dlm keadaan yg panas n ngembak laptop sya sbb sya ngan marly nak ngato laptop daknya alu la soh azyan brk kat kakak housemate nya. kakya lepak jak lam bilit azyan then kol 3.30 gya trn g jumpa puteri ambik duit g jump dak kay. mekorg g kl. blt ari la. kakya tggu alia sbb nak ambik duit juak then g kl la. 1st kay drive then marly. sampe kl kol brapa ndak ka. aku pun x ingat. lepak kat nz curry house sampe 7.30 sbb masa ya jak bok dpt ambik cupcakes. dah la pekerja cya gatl. then ada pengkid. gelik nangga. pengkid ya customer la. kakya blt la mekorg. x la blt trus. g sg wang jap tp parking kat lot 10. jumpa kakak marly jap. sumpah lawa bak kata daknya. nang kck alu la. nang kdk org putih bna. kdk artis ada juak.haa. kakya g sg wang tp kdy byk tutup. kakya blt la mekorg. g umah alia jap anta cupcakes. aku tdo lam keta b4 sampe umah alia ku bgn then sya gurin kat bahu ku. kakya kay n azyan anta kek dlm umah alia. pintu dibkk. bonet pun. ada pusak alia kat luar. ada ka pusak ya masok lam keta. grr. aku dah xpat grk sbb ada sya kat bahu. tpaksa men msg ngan kay. haha. kakya blt la mekorg. lelah eh. haha.

gajah g men futsal. suppose aku n gajah jumpa mlm tok tek tp nya g main futsal. agak hampa juak la aku. kecewa juak. tp biar la. xda org gago. haih. xpala. next time la. ya pun mun xda alasan k x jumpa kan gajah?

suppose ada class maths n group discussion rtok. tp ku n azyan x g. haha.
sorry miss ruby n naseer!

bh. ku nak tdo lok. gajah tok juak eh. haha.

babai.

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ok ok. lets go

Sunday, August 17, 2008 at 8:17 AM
ok. we change our mind. mekorg kluar. haha. dgn azyan. yayay nya dah blt dh. yer. suk la azyan spend the day ngan grk nya dr marek. haa. g jj sbb nak mkn. aku beli bagel with cream cheese. nyaman eh. haa. jumpa gajah. teman sya g mkn steamboat. aku mkn banana split. nyaman. i like. haha. kakya mkekorg jln2 la kat jj ya then g melaka mall. ala. seberang jak. mekorg x k jejantas. malas. haha.

ada sigek bj. xla bj. xtauk la gne nak mdh. nya sluar. ada namanya tp ku lupak. kat kdy blossom. aku ska. aku mok beli. tp. ala mayb later la. haha.

then mekorg lintas jln gk g dataran. lepak cya jap. best la. haha. mun picnic ya best. haaa. ada biak main aek pancut ya. haha.

kakya mekorg blt. pakcik teksi ya agak peloya la. haha. tp xpala. nya mbk mekorg blt ba. haha.

haa. dah la. sok ku knk bgn b4 9.

sok ku g kl. dgn azyan n ntah sapa gk nak ekot. we're driving. doa2 la k mekorg.

mlm ya mekorg ada bus. maths pun replacement class. aiyoyoyo.

laptop my roommate rosak. xpat on sbb carrot susu tumpah kat laptop nya. haaa. i wonder gne leh tumpah.

haa. babai. :)

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hari ahad. hari bosan. :D

Saturday, August 16, 2008 at 11:07 PM
hari ini agak bosan.

marek. apa ku polah marek owh. haha. marek mekorg kluar. g dp n mp. daknya beli brg. ku ekot jak la. kakya ekot alia g umah toys stories sbb ada open house kat umah nya then g mkn dgn azyan n grk nya n kwn grk nya kat tom yam classic. x la nyaman alu. haha. mekorg sewa keta. suppose g pantai klebang tp x jd sbb agak bengang dgn keta kwn grk azyan ya. grr. mekorg lepak dkt pantey blakang holiday inn jak la. sya siap mbk bantal gk. otw ya aku nangis. grr. ada la sbb nya. haha. haih kakya mekorg ada nangga free movie. org kissing kat sblh mekorg. kat foodcourt ixora pun ada. xmalu na eh. g la tmpt len owh nok private kit. aiya.

kat mp ada jj n rudy avril pun concert. tp x ramey la dtg. hahaha

big apple dah ada kat mp dah. yay! aku ada g marek. niat aku dtg cya nak beli choreo 6 pieces. skali nangga tggl 2 jak nak dah siap. so ku doa2 la tek aku dpt sigek pun xpa. skali nangga ada biak kat dpn aku ya nya g ambik smua choreo ya. damn u! aku mok ba. grrr. kakya ku tnyk la abg ya ada choreo gk x nya mdh lmk gk. aku dah nak nangis dah masa ya sbb aku xpat mkn choreo. bodo sial. so ku beli la nok lain. chocolate apa ntah. kakya lepak la kat luar. then mekorg masok ku nangga choreo. aku dah nak beli tp peratusan aku dpt choreo ya agak rendah sbb ramey org queue up. haih. bila la lagik ku dpt mkn choreo eh. sob sob. i really want choreo. :(

aku rasa netok agak lapa n maok mkn bagel with cream cheese n pure vanilla kat coffee bean. :D

aku dah nangga cta wall e! best. walaupun sal robot n x bckp glak tp best. ada love2 juak la. sal wall e ngan eva. best. a should seen movie.

aku ada mkn chicken chop kat apple burger masa aku g jln dgn azyan n housemate nya. nyaman eh. asa cam nak mkn lagik. haha. :D

mekorg x kluar ba rtok.

gajah g kl marek. jumpa parents nya n he bought a blue baju melayu nya pdh.

aku bosan. lalalalalalala

dah la. haaa
babai. :D

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orewa

Friday, August 15, 2008 at 1:08 AM
sunyi sepi
smua terasa.
aku benci
aku benci
begini.

rtok ku xda kelas. lab class dah xda.

ku tdo kat umah dak kay mlm tek.

mekorg g mkn marek. kol 9.30. tp ku x mkn la. ku ekot jak sbb ku dah mkn kat umah. mekorg masak nasik goreng n ayam drummet ya. nyaman. haha. mlm ya ku krel kay sya n azyan g mkn kat apa ndak ka nama tmpt ya. xtauk juak ku eh. kakya g kdy shisha. sya xda mood. then g tepi laut dkt holiday inn ya. aku boring ku ambik la gamba. ada keta kacak alu eh. aku da ambik gamba. haha. jumpa alia n grk nya. lepak sama la. kakya blt la mekorg lkk sya dah ok. i thought wanna meet gajah tp nya xpat. haha. agak hampa tp xpala. lalalalala. pagi tok tek kol 8 gya ku blt bilit then tdo blt kakya bgn blt kol 10 gya sbb azyan soh g umah dak kay gk. g la. ku nangga cta the happening. agak best tp ku x abis nangga. haha. kakya mekorg g mkn kat food court ixora then blt la. haa.

next week business week. haa. mekog jual2 kat mosque square. tepi masjid. haa. apa mekorg jual? nangga kdrk la. haha.
gajah, g la. bring ur frens n ur gf.

rtok x jd class maths ya. yayay! yg ada mlm tok
8pm - outrecs
farah pdh 2 more weeks ada trip g gua tempurung kat perak. ku nak g eh. wee.

aku agak bosan. dan panas.

apis. apis decide nak lost contact dgn aku. hanya seperkara. how could u. just because of it alu nak pts kawan. dont u know its a sin ?

lupa trlupa dilupa.
itu aku.
org lupa akan aku dan mereka hanya mampu brkata trlupa sdgkan aku mmg dilupakan.
x mengapa. aku biasa dilupakan.

rtok bday xsan. marek bday mark.
lamak x jumpa dak duak. xsan alu call aku lkk aku wish nya. aawww. haha.

aaa. on 20082008 ada fresh frequency. mmusic society (club gajah) mlh. my roomate alu soh ku reserve 4 ticket. hopefully best la. byk band perform. ada yg nyanyi fall for you by secondhand serenade. gajah pdh la.

aku nak g umah azyan lok. nya ajak. haha.

bah2. babai.

u think u loving but u dont love me
i want to break free
baby uve hurt me~

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Wednesday, August 13, 2008 at 9:37 PM
be mine- robyn for u although u dont like the lirik. haha.

It’s a good thing tears never show in the pouring rain
As if a good thing ever could make up for all the pain
There’ll be no last chance I promise to never mess it up again
Just a sweet pain of watching your back as you walk
As I’m watching you walk away
And now you’re gone it’s like an echo in my head
And I remember every word you said

It’s a cruel thing you’ll never know all the ways I tried
It’s a hard thing faking a smile when I feel like I’m falling apart inside
And now you’re gone it’s like an echo in my head
And I remember every word you said

And you never were, and you never will be mine
No, you never were, and you never will be mine

For the first time, there is no mercy in your eyes
And the cold wind is hitting my face and you’re gone
And you’re walking away
And I am helpless, sometimes
Wishing’s just no good
Cause you don’t see me like I wish you would

Cause you never were, and you never will be mine
No, you never were, and you never will be mine

There’s a moment to seize everytime that we meet
But you have always keep passing me by

But you never were, and you never will be mine

[Spoken:]
I saw you at the station
You had your arm around what’s her name
She had on that scarf I gave you
and you got down to tie her laces

Cause you never were, and you never will be mine
(You looked happy and that’s great)
No, you never were, and you never will be mine
(I just miss you, that’s all)

Cause you never were, and you never will be mine
No, you never were, and you never will be mine

There’s a moment to seize everytime that we meet
But you have always keep passing me by

No, you never were, and you never will be mine
Cause you never were, and you never will be mine
No, you never were, and you never will be mine

There’s a moment to seize everytime that we meet
But you have always keep passing me by
No, you never were, and you never will be mine


warwick avenue- duffy

When i get to Warwick avenue
Meet me by the entrance of the tube
We can talk things over a little time
Promise me you wont stay up by the light

Chorus
When i get to Warwick avenue
Please drop the past and be true
Dont' think we're ok just cos im here
You hurt me bad but i wont shed a tear

I'm leaving you for the last time baby
You think your loving but you don't love me
And I've been confused and out of my mind latley
You think your loving but i want to be free
Baby you've hurt me

Chorus x1

no substitute love - estelle

You know who it is
Oh boy Oh boy
I'm not your substitute lover (said im not)
Said boy I'm not your substitute lover

I know it would have been nice if i could have had your body
Knowing that everybody aint been with you
But you told me lies you made me give my heart away
But now i know the games you play
So im thru with you

Oh boy oh boy
Im not your substitue lover oh no
Said boy oh boy im not your sub lover oh no

You know theres gonna be a fight if these chicks keep calling you at night
I see that text your tryin to hide see i know the truth
Must be outta your mind you thought youd never see the day
You thought id let a player play but ima upgrade you, listen boy

Oh boy oh boy
Im not your substitue lover oh no
Said boy oh boy im not your sub lover oh no

See theres not much you can say
He said hes done changed and i finished today
Cus i cant do it no more i will be there when you call
So you besta move on (move on)
Because i couldnt be your sub anymore

Listen, i see you called my name like i


hari ini aku eskep kelas kol 8. sbb aku agak xda mud nak g kelas n mls nak bgn. haha. so ku buat pertama kali nya pdh azyan aku xmao g kelas english ya. haha. azyan pa gk. suk la. haha. kakya bgn kol 9 kakya g kelas. kakya g mkn. babi bff eh. bencik ku nangga. i hate u. lalalalal. we all hate u. pdh la ngan org len cta bulak kau ya. pegi mtk simpati org. bongok. huh!

kelas ku kol 4-6 lak ba. dah microeconomic. haih.

marly blt pd rtok. bas kol 1 gya.

sok ada outrecs meeting n math class. mlm gk ya. grrr.

things getting difficult. im sorry but i wont let u leave
itu kata nya.

but u still cant choose n wont leave her.

rasa mcm nak terjun dr ixora jak. mun x knk lantak lori ka.haa.

me n apis talking about alip. haha. calie2. kwn nya cta sal alip ba. nya mdh alip paling tahan nyawa. sbb nya exciden dlk x mati juak, nya knk tetak kat pp oleh iban masa kelai sampe bisak n nampak gg maseh idup juak. salu kelai btumbok pa indah x juak mati. haha. nang bna la. tahan anak ya eh. nya bait apa actually. cuma pangey nya ya jak. mekorg dpt kapel 1 year plus eh. tahan juakku ngan pangey anak ya. haha. lmk x jumpa nya ya eh. aku blt rya pun x jumpa.

aku agak boring n ngantok. haha.
n panas juak.

gajah exam mlm tok. 8-10. haaa

aku bosan.
aku mahu happy.
please.
aku benci begini.

hmm.

dah la. babai.
mahu menguruskan hati dan jiwa yg tidak tentu arah.

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oh weee

at 12:03 PM
currently:
chatting with gajah
listening to warwick avenue by duffy. i like that song. damn nice. im addicted to it. really.
u think u loving but u dont love me~ i want to be free baby u've heard me~ :D

aku lapa.
rasa mcm nak mkn.
dlm fikiranku :
choreo,roti bom manis kat subaidah,apa gk tek owh. ada sigek gk.lupak. haha.

i saw a very nice view pg tek. agak ceria. really. syg ku x ambik gamba
the view is:
gajah walking with her gf nak g kelas.

aku n azyan gelak. bkn gelak sbb lucu. aku gelak krn sakit. damn hurt. azyan brkata sesuatu kat aku. n apa yg nya pdh mmg btol. n nya pdh gya sbb nya xmao nangga aku cam. adala. haha. ne leh pdh ctok. :D

ok. rtok agak. ntah la. bgn kol 10 sbb kelas kol 8 cancel sbb ada nok ptptn ya so g kelas comp app kol 11. g mkn lok then nangga view yg indah ya n g kelas. miss ngkah nama aku n azyan n puteri kat barred list. dammit. tp nya pdh sbb nya x update gk nok org tuka kelas lab g rabu. thank god.theng mkn. kakya g fundamental jap. kluar kol 2. maka kelas abis kol 3. gara2 ptptn. aku tmn alia puteri ngan azyan. so ku tggu kat luar. jumpa myra n byk gk la. x trkabir ku nak pdh smua. haha. i cried just now. sbb pressure glak dibuat oleh apis. hmm. nya pdh something ba. kakya daknya abis ptptn ya g jj mkn. g kopibin jumpa gajah then g mkn kat fudcourt jj. mkn teppanyaki then g kopibin gk. kakya blt. btw aku drive tek. drive keta alia sbb nya lelah. haha. mlm kol 8 suppose ada test. skali nangga postpone kol 9.30 so daknya agak bengang la then cancel. sian liew tze wei. aiya. kakya g mkn tp ku x mkn. haha. kakya blt la. grk alia dok lam bonet. haha. nya maok glak. tp nasib dkt. haa.

honestly :
aku rasa ku nak smoke tek. ckit gk nak beli tp aku tahan. haha. im a good girl. :P

aku mok mkn aku mok mkn!
haha

marek ku g nangga gajah men bola. 1st time ku nangga nya men bola. haha. n bola ckit gk knk aku. cubala ku x alih owh. haha.

ala. gajah dah nak tdo. sok ku sambong gk la k?
babai.

p/s to gajah:
b, i love u. u know that kan? eventhough sometime what u do it hurts me. example tadik but i still love u. baby, if u cant leave her i'll surrender. seeing both of u tadik make me feel guilty towards ur gf. if she knows about us she'll say i'm the one who take u away from her. n people around us who know about us might say kmk tok perampas grk org bitch n whatsoever. i dont want to be called like that b. n me. its killing me. knowing that u're still someone elses n not fully mine n not officially mine. i'll wait but sampe bila ktk nak mlh kmk daktok b? we're hiding n pretending. who am i n what am i b? what should i tell people who ask me what is my status. xkan kmk nak mdh in a relationship with someone but that someone is someone elses. mek tauk mek menyusahkan b dgn mala jak pdh daktok. but its how i feel. i know ktk pun bingong (or not) dgn situasi tok. kmk lebih bingong dr ktk. it seems like u dont want to leave her. apis did pdh something about this. n it kills me too. nya mala pdh2 ba. heu. i love u. i really do.


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